I won’t say where or when but I am going to be doing my first stand up act in a few days. It is open mic night so it’s not like I am headlining but it’ll be an interesting experience nevertheless. So you people who have been telling me I should be doing standup here I go.

If it goes well enough I’ll post my set video on here. Don’t hold your breath though.

If you didn’t know already I had a catostrophic engine failure as a result of a timing belt failure back in June. It costs me over $4000 to fix it and I thought I was stuck with the cost but apparently it’s happened to enough people that Audi had no choice but to settle a class-action suit.

They even have a website. If you own a 2000-2003 A4 or TT that is under 105k miles you can get some relief here.

I just got back from the Bahamas where my friends have a house and invited me out. Had an amazing time. Saw all the stars one could see and came back with some new outlooks on life. I also got to see the Bimini Road which I am now not so certain was a road but I am not a scientist

I also got bitten up by some bugs that are still itching me now…

Two things when you go to the Bahamas…Take less clothes than you think you need and take bug spray.

Iran’s state run media released a photo of 4 missles launching in a PR effort to make themselves look tough and frighten it’s neighbors. Well, in reality the french figured out something was up and saw that the image looked digitally altered.

When called on their “photoshopping” they issued an updated image with one dud missile not launched.

Now if I was running the Iran media I would have gone over the top to scare the west. Here is my artistic liberties:

Or even more horrifying:

This is nothing new. How can we condemn Iran when we have photoshopped Katie Couric?

Had my first really cool lucid dream the other day. For those of you who don’t know what Lucid Dreaming (LD) is about read about it on wiki. Anyway, I started dreaming and I knew I was dreaming but I was able to choose to stay asleep. I was in my house and I was playing a game where I summon items to my hand like Jedi’s can do in star wars. That was pretty fun but I got bored with summoning items and I tried to fly. It was really hard. My feet kept going over my head and I had a lot of trouble. Then I wondered if I could summon a hottie for some fun but the phreaking phone rang and woke me up. Dammit!

Anyway. LD’ing is amazing and everyone should try it. Again, check the wiki for more info.

Photo Credit: http://www.richardalois.com

Want to focus at work or on a task that requires concentration and a clear head without hearing your co-workers or fiddling with your ipod trying to find the songs that don’t distract? Well, head over to SimplyNoise. These guys generate “White Noise” which has enough sound to drown out background noises yet is bland enough to not distract. I have it running right now and it doesn’t phase me in the least.

Great! Another sign that the world is slowly dying. Coral around the globe is dying because of sunscreen getting into the ocean and doing nasty stuff. Read about it here and see photos of the coral reef in Key West before and after. I have read in the past that the Coral Reef is the largest “living” creature on the planet and is responsible for a lot of the planets oxygen. We all know that we are doomed as a species but this is just more evidence of such.

He said once in an interview that his epitaph was to be “He was just here a minute ago”.

Carlin will be remembered as probably the one of the greatest entertainers who ever lived. His satire and common sense will ring true for generations. This is our generations greatest comedic loss. Read more about his life and I recommend you watch his videos on youtube. I had a chance to see him last year and I wasn’t able to get tickets.

Well, I am an uncle again. My Brother Dennis who posts over at idude.org just had their second girl. I can’t wait till I can spoil this one ;)

Well, I found out that my Audi had 9 blown valves. Total cost around $3500. Fantastic!

Anyway, I am going back to KY to pick it up and drive it home. Considering that I am getting around 11mpg on my truck this car is worth every penny.

This just tells you how distracted the general populace is. We landed on Mars and they are going to be looking for life in the arctic ice but all people seem to talk about is the stupid Sex in the city movie. Maybe if Nasa had a new Iphone 3g strapped to their rover it’d get some attention. btw, here is the site for all the Phoenix lander info if you want to keep an eye on something meaningful:

 

Ok, this is a stretch but I have had this in my file for awhile and I post it more for humors sake rather than a serious concept. The Japanese, in WWII decided to use the then-unknown Jet stream to send over balloon bombs across the ocean and bomb the Pacific Northwest. A few dozen were shot down. The press and military covered it up to avoid panic and a bunch of them are still rusting away in the forest somewhere.  Amazing that most people have never heard of this attack in WW II. It is the only known aerial bombing of the American homeland by a foreign adversary. Read on Wiki

Tired of having robots doing things we should be doing ourselves. Someday when our robots overthrow us they will remember the great robot explorer “SnoMote” who was a pioneer in that he photographed some ice and then got stuck on a  snowball and died.

Last time this happened it was in a distant galaxy far far away a long time ago:

ATLANTA (AP) - Robotic rovers have patrolled deep space and the deepest seas, but scientists are still struggling to create drones that can overcome the multiple challenges of exploring Antarctica.

Georgia Tech researchers think the SnoMote - a small robot designed like a snowmobile - will be able to deal with the nasty weather and with slippery terrain that constantly cracks and shifts. Read more.

I am CLEARED now! Breeze through airport security. If you sign up use my code and sign up I get a free  kitten! My code is: DSCAM1138815

UPDATE:
I did make it home albeit via a rental car. My car is still in KY with 3/4 cylinders blown. At least I found a decent Audi Mechanic in my parents home time.

I was headed home this weekend and decided I’d drive my audi since I got a new top on it recently and I haven’t really taken it out on a long drive. Well, I made it to London, KY before is sputtered to a stall.

I think I have to take it to Knoxville on tuesday to get it fixed. ugh

I don’t have an iphone. I opted to wait until the 3g version and I know I have missed some iphone love but my crackberry is churning along just fine. However, rumors are that a new iphone will hit us on June 9th. If you have an old tired iphone and don’t feel like waiting outside the store for 2 days to get your new 3g then you should check this guy out. Does an amazing makeover and the phone looks much cooler than even the “leaked” photos of the new 3g.

Hey everyone. Forget global warming. A giant floating infant choking hazard is spinning around in the pacific. I think we finally figured out where all the recycled stuff goes. Check out this multi-part documentary on it. I watched the whole thing. Amazing documentary!

More:
“Out of Sight, Out of Mind”

About a month ago I reported here that VW is DC United’s new jersey sponsor. Well, here is the details:

The deal is for $3.7 Million per year making it second only to LA Galaxy’s deal with Herbalife.

This comes courtesy of The Business Journal:

D.C. United signs Volkswagen to jersey sponsorship deal

Washington Business Journal
Volkswagen has signed a jersey sponsorship deal with D.C. United that will deliver as much as $3.7 million annually to the professional soccer team, making it the second largest jersey deal in league history. The deal is expected to be announced this week, according to the Sports Business Journal, a sister publication of the Washington Business Journal.
The deal also makes Volkswagen the official automotive partner of Major League Soccer for an additional $1 million to $2 million annually. Officials with MLS declined to comment. MLS has been without a major auto sponsor since Honda ended its relationship with the league last year. Volkswagen Group of America recently moved its corporate headquarters from Auburn Hills, Mich., to Herndon.

Apparently if you aren’t careful a wizard will shrink your penis. I mean, this whole story probably started after some guy got out of the cold swimming pool and his girlfriend was giggling at his shrinkage. “A sorceror did it!, Yea, that’s it!”

This goalie totally ripped off my move. This is also why my goalkeeping career was very short. I think I watched this like 20x and I LOL’d and ROFL’d but didn’t LMAO.

This is a video that I have had in my fav’s list in youtube and I thought I’d share.

Charley the Unicorns (Ok, this is annoying but really funny when you are buzzed) and it does pay off at the end:

and the followup

In a time when the City and the team are just fighting for the location and timeframe I think something more important has been missed. We’ve seen images in the past of what a new stadium might look like but those renderings are old and the selection of an architect is not even solidified yet.

On the other hand. Other cities and clubs are more focused on the asthetics and uniquiness of their new home field.

One Impressive stadium is Valencia FC’s ambitious new stadium.

See more at the architects homepage.

Portsmouth Football club and Sellar Properties have today unveiled ambitious plans for a 600m development in Portsmouth. It also only holds 36,000 which I think would be a great size for DC United and would allow us to host International matches and house Beckham’s posse.

Via Yanko Design

I will someday build my own home. I am into the odd and modern homes. This is an example of a very cool house in Australia. via: Yatzer

Monaco House, 2008 | Melbourne

Read the rest of this entry »

From Yanko Design:

Hive is a simulated surround sound speaker system. As of now the market only has two options - either spread speakers around the room for the real experience or invest in a sound bar which usually consists of a long bar housing anywhere between 8-30 small speakers pointing in every direction for a simulated experience.

The Hive takes the latter approach but adds in a bit of design since sound bars are pretty boring. The hexagonal honey comb pattern is graphic, bold, and each cell can pivot or turn for a truly customized audible experience. And don?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢t worry about messy cables or cords. The Hive only has 2 at most - one for power, and one to connect to your home entertainment system.

Designer: Oskar Daniel

My Corporate logo:

This is one of those stories you see on the history channel when they are not doing a Hitler special. The Howard Hughes movie “Aviator” didn’t really touch at all on this part of his life. It is a compelling read about espionage at the deepest depths of the ocean. The retrieval of a Russian Nuclear sub. Enjoy the timewaster.

Other good reading:
Project Jennifer / Hughes Glomar Explorer
Scientific American Frontiers . Mysteries of the Deep

You can listen to the ocean under the Antarctic ice via this research station feed. It’s called: PALAOA ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú the PerenniAL Acoustic Observatory in the Antarctic Ocean. Read more here.

It is usually just clicks and pops but I listened long enough to hear some ice collisions or what I thought were ice collisions and what sounds like storms occasionally.